Amateur Translations – Asairo Introduction

Introduction

Supposedly very bitching difficult to translate – but I have tried over here, at least, the introduction. Of course translation always involves the tradeoff between flow & meaning – and my motto is to try and minimize stuff like footnotes as much as I can. Try to fit the information into parenthetical – and maintain the flow of the text. So far the introduction has only one considerably tricky portion.

As to my actual progress in the game, I reached the point just slightly after the moment where a lame ecchi anime trope is given to the level of pathos and poetry that is akin to those memory recollection scenes in Proust – and so I decided that I should probably wait until I can parse the content at a faster rate so that I can feel the full rush.

For the comparison below, the furigana is placed in brackets. The dots are the emphasis/italicization furigana, but I didn’t really carry that over into the translation this time.

Translation

And among the mountains – dyed vivid hues.

As if – from the sky – varied splatters of paints toppled and spilled, soaking into bright tones.

All differing values and strengths. Had you looked at this mountain-covered canvas – the season was before you – a single sheet of ‘Fall’.

And with the season came the donning of new coats for the trees – red and yellow – for the construction of the autumnal colors.

The autumn reds of the region. It’s normal to forget, and let pass – but there’s still that cognizance – that the change of colors stems from trees with leaves to be shorn.

Constant to the name ‘Evergreen’ – they maintain their leaves.

But there are no such thing as year-long waters, and the genial equilibrium maintaining these trees – such an ideal environment is bound for collapse.

They relinquish leaves – to live.

And so leaves fall – because the trees begin to retain the nourishment they would have otherwise sent to the leaves, and these excised leaves would sigh and grieve at their separation – thus, turning pale.

As those leaves cast away in red have been ‘red-leaving’
As those leaves cast away in yellow have been ‘yellow-left’
As those leaves cast away in sable have been ‘sable-lived’

Each and all shedding their tears.

This weeping is commonly known as ‘Maple’.

Now, it isn’t particularly that I have this enjoyment from the tears of the trees – in truth, today is also my ‘ascent to school’.

“This school forms the egg of the artist. But the entrance is narrow, and, from within, you must bite and scratch at the shell with everything you have.”

This school – “Yumemidori Academy” – a school for dreaming fledglings – you could rightly say that this is my place of enrollment.

Many have wished it, but fewer get through.
The holy mountain for artistic aspirants – which may explain the narrowness of the gate.

Its alumni are always making ripples in the world.
And the profession of an artist is based on rocky foundations – so can you exactly understand how singularly strange this is?

If I were to draw a graph – could I surmise how weird this is?

This faith in the name of Yumemidori Academy (though some may call it ‘branding’) is such that – even putting the actual administration aside – the rumors of the violent culling occurring during enrollment period is enough to protect its status.

It isn’t a matter of quantity.
Amongst the thousand, should we discern only one – we will be glad to profit in him.
Otherwise, let the thousand fall.

This holy mountain stands tall, even amongst mountains.

A place for students to get their flash of inspiration – and taking that into consideration – also a concentration point of productive activity. The choosing leads to the corresponding consequence – so it is said.

With not a private house in sight, it bears itself as a solitary rock in a sea of mountain points.

And today, I find myself headed for the open gates of Yumemidori Academy – currently ascending the mountain.

Where the summit seats the castle of our dreams – and we, who are our wishes, can only struggle through.

Japanese Comparison

(1) 山中を染め上げる鮮やかな色彩。

Translation
And among the mountains – dyed in vivid hues.

(2) まるで空から大小様々な絵の具を降り零したかのような、明色の染み──

Translation
As if – from the sky – varied splatters of paints had toppled and spilled, soaking into bright tones.

(3) 濃淡も強弱も異なれど、山を一つの画布 (カンバス)として見れば、そこに出来上がるのは“秋”という名の一枚絵だ。

Translation
All differing values and strengths. Had you looked at this mountain-covered canvas – the season was before you – a single sheet of ‘Fall’.

(4) この季節になると樹木の葉は赤色や黄色に衣替えをして、そこに紅葉の風景を作り上げる。

Translation
And with the season came the donning of new coats for the trees – red and yellow – for the construction of the autumnal colors.

(5) それがこの国の秋の風景──なんて認識が当たり前 のようにまかり通っているけれど、実は色が変わるのは落葉樹林だけなのだ。

Translation
The autumn reds of the region. It’s normal to forget, and let pass – but there’s still that cognizance – that the change of colors stems from trees with leaves to be shorn.

(6) 常緑樹林はその名の通り、常に葉を保持する。

Translation
Constant to the name ‘Evergreen’ – they maintain their leaves.

(7) けれど年中水分に不足せず、温暖で居心地のいい環境──なんて、樹木にとって理想的な環境はそうそうない。

Translation
But there are no such thing as year-long waters, and the genial equilibrium maintaining these trees – such an ideal environment is bound for collapse.

(8) だから樹木は葉を落とす。生き残る為に。

Translation
They relinquish leaves – to live.

(9) 葉が落ちるっていうのは、つまり樹木が葉に送っていた養分を自身に蓄え始めた為であり、切り捨てられた (・・・・・・・) 葉は──まるで捨てられた事を嘆くかのように、色を失う。

Translation
And so leaves fall – because the trees begin to retain the nourishment they would have otherwise sent to the leaves, and these excised leaves would sigh and grieve at their separation – thus, turning pale.

(10) 葉が赤色に失われるものを“紅葉 (こうよう)”──

葉が黄色に失われるものを“黄葉 (おうよう)”──

葉が褐色に失われるものを“褐葉 (かつよう)”──

Translation
As those leaves cast away in red have been ‘red-leaving’
As those leaves cast away in yellow have been ‘yellow-left’
As those leaves cast away in brown have been ‘’brown-lived’

Commentary
The 葉 array are used in the sense of verbs (from the を) despite being nouns, but よう can also map to the verb ‘use’ or ‘utilized’. So there’s a double-pun involving leaves being mixed with ‘used’.

Actually I’m not 100% sure whether that’s the purpose, but the connotation exists, and he also used the lesser known reading of ‘おう’ for yellow, when it can also be read as こうよう. The word 応用 (おうよう) may also be 鷹揚 – the first contains ‘heart’ in it while the second means large-hearted or generous. 活用(かつよう) maps to the concept of ‘life’ – as in ‘daily use’.

This gives a plethora of approaches to translation. The lowest approach is to just take it as a noun and write something like “As those leaves cast away in red have been formed ‘red-leaves’. Second approach is to take it as ‘use’ and focus solely on that connection “As those leaves cast away in yellow have been used till yellow”. Third approach is to try to get both, and all the other semantic connotations – which is probably impossible unless you can think of a higher level pun – “yellow-folioled” (yellow-fellowed)?

All of these concepts of ‘leaving behind’ and ‘generosity’ are quite relevant to what comes shortly after though – with regards to the protagonist’s past and all that. So there is that layer to look over.

(11) これはそれぞれが泣いた結果。

Translation
Each and all shedding their tears.

(12) ──この涙を総称して、“紅葉 (もみじ)”と呼ぶ。

Translation
This weeping is commonly known as ‘Maple’.

(13) さて、俺は別に葉の涙を観賞しにきたわけではない。
実は、俺は今“登校中”なのだ。

Translation
Now, it isn’t particularly that I have this enjoyment from the tears of the trees – in truth, today is also my ‘ascent to school’.

(14) 「──その学び舎には芸術家の卵が集う。だがその門は狭く、卵であるにも内側から殻を食い破る才覚が必要だ──」

Translation
“This school forms the egg of the artist. But the entrance is narrow, and, from within, you must bite and scratch at the shell with everything you have.”

(15) 俺が入学した『夢見鳥学園』は、よくそんなふうにいわれている。

Translation
This school – “Yumemidori Academy” – a school for dreaming fledglings – you could rightly say that this is my place of enrollment.

(16) 入学希望者の数は非常に多く、しかし実際の生徒数は極端に少ない。
芸術家を志す者にとっての霊峰とまで呼ばれ、だからこそ、その門のいかに狭い事か。

Translation
Many have wished it, but fewer get through.
The holy mountain for artistic aspirants – which may explain the narrowness of the gate.

(17) ここの卒業生は常に世間の注目を集める。
芸術家なんて保証のない職業で、それがどれだけ特異な事だかわかるだろうか。

Translation
Its alumni are always making ripples in the world.
And the profession of an artist is based on rocky foundations – so can you exactly understand how singularly strange this is?

(18) それが成り立っている(・・・・・・・・)という図式が、どれだけ異常な事なのか。

Translation
If I were to draw a graph – could I surmise how weird this is?

(19) 夢見鳥学園という名の持つ信仰 (ブランド) は、経営を度外視しているとさえ噂される入学時の猛烈な振るい落としでこそ保たれている。

Translation
This faith in the name of Yumemidori Academy (though some may call it ‘branding’) is such that – even putting the actual administration aside – the rumors of the violent culling occurring during enrollment period is enough to protect its status.

(20) 人数なんて関係ない。
千人応募して一人でもお眼鏡に適う者がいれば儲けもの。
いなければ、ただ千人を落とすだけ。

Translation
It isn’t a matter of quantity.
Amongst the thousand, should we discern only one – we will be glad to profit in him.
Otherwise, let the thousand fall.

(21) その霊峰は、まさに山中にこそ聳 (そび) え立つ。

Translation
This holy mountain stands tall, even amongst mountains.

(22) それは生徒たちに閃き (インスピレーション) を与える場を考慮したものであり、同時に作品作りに集中できる舞台を選びに選んだ結果だという話だ。

Translation
A place for students to get their flash of inspiration – and taking that into consideration – also a concentration point of productive activity. The choosing leads to the corresponding consequence – so it is said.

(23) 付近に民家の一軒もなく、その様はまさしく山岳の孤島。

Translation
With not a private house in sight, it bears itself as a solitary rock in a sea of mountain points.

(24) 本日より、晴れて夢見鳥学園へと通う事になった俺は今、山を登っている。

Translation
And today, I find myself headed for the open gates of Yumemidori Academy – currently ascending the mountain.

(25) あの頂 (いただき) に座する芸術家志望 (おれたち) の王城へと、辿り着く為に──

Translation
Where the summit seats the castle of our dreams – and we, who are our wishes, can only struggle through.

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